After a while

After a while is a poem about learning life’s lessons. It’s probably one of the most sensible pieces of relationship advice I’ve ever seen.

So of course I had to mess with it. There are a few variants posted on different poetry websites. However, this, I believe, is the original poem …

After a while by Veronica Shoftsall

After a while you learn the subtle difference Between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning And company doesn’t mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts And presents aren’t promises. And you begin to accept your defeats With your head up and your eyes open With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child. And you learn to build all your roads on today Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans, And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight. After a while you learn That even sunshine burns if you get too much. So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure,

That you really are strong, And you really do have worth. And you learn and learn… With every goodbye you learn.

Version 2 by Sharon Gill

After a while you learn that the reason you hold hands Is to stop you from killing each other. And that love is sometimes just a word Often used instead of companionship. And that kisses are easily given And presents are often an indication that he’s been up to something. And you learn that every time they hurt you It hurts a little bit less until eventually Nothing they do hurts you anymore. And you begin to accept that there’s no such thing as defeat Because he hasn’t won anything. And you learn to build temporary roads on today Because your direction will probably change tomorrow. After a while you learn that too much of anything can make you sick. So you forget about flowers and chocolates and Stupid Valentine’s Day cards and anniversaries Because it’s all just a money-making racket anyway. And you learn that you’re stronger than you think, And you’re worth way more than you think. And every goodbye makes you stronger and wiser And less likely to take any crap from the next one.